Finding Your True Self: How to Break Free from False Identities and Step into Fulfillment

As women, it’s easy to lose ourselves in the roles we play—whether as mothers, partners, professionals, or caregivers. We often get so caught up in what we do for others that we forget who we are. When your identity is shaped by these external factors, you may eventually feel lost or unfulfilled. If you’ve ever felt this way, you may be struggling with an identity crisis. The good news is that you can find your way back to your true self.

Finding your true self; woman standing in a mirror taking a selfie

How to Know If You’re Having an Identity Crisis

Do any of these resonate with you?

  • You feel disconnected from yourself: You can’t recall the last time you did something just for yourself or felt joy that wasn’t tied to your roles.
  • You seek external validation constantly: Your sense of self-worth fluctuates depending on praise or approval from others. When it’s absent, you feel empty.
  • You’ve lost sight of your passions: Once you had hobbies, dreams, and ambitions. Now, they feel distant or forgotten.
  • You feel stuck and overwhelmed: You’re so busy with expectations—being a mom, partner, or employee—that you’ve lost touch with what lights you up.

If you identify with any of these signs, it’s possible you’re experiencing a disconnect between who you really are and the roles you’ve come to identify with.

The Trap of False Identities

As women, we often base our identities on things outside of ourselves. These include our children, spouse, career, or societal expectations. While these roles are meaningful, they don’t define who we are. When we tie our identity solely to external labels, we end up placing our self-worth in the hands of others.

This is what I call a “false identity.” It can stunt your growth and keep you from reaching your highest potential. When your identity is tied to things outside of yourself, fulfillment is hard to come by. Deep down, you’re living out someone else’s expectations rather than being true to who you are. This disconnect leads to frustration, burnout, and the constant feeling that “I’m not enough.”

But you are enough—just as you are. Finding your true self is about peeling back those layers to reconnect with the woman you’ve always been.

3 Action Steps to Reclaim Your True Self

Ready to break free from the false identities that have kept you stuck? Here are three steps to help you reconnect with your authentic self and rediscover what truly fulfills you:

1. Get Curious About Who You Are Without the Labels

Who are you when you’re not “Mom,” “Wife,” “Boss,” or “Friend”? It’s time to peel away those labels and get curious about you. Ask yourself questions like:

  • What do I love doing just for the sake of doing it?
  • What excites me and makes me feel alive?
  • If no one else was watching, what would I spend my time doing?

Take time to reflect on these questions. The key is to separate your identity from the roles you play and rediscover what makes you unique.

2. Set Boundaries and Prioritize Yourself

To find your true self, you need to create space to reconnect. This means setting boundaries and making time just for you. It could mean saying “no” to certain demands or delegating tasks that don’t serve you. Prioritizing your growth, passions, and needs is essential to your well-being. It’s not selfish—it’s necessary.

3. Reconnect with Your Passions and Desires

Many of us abandon our dreams and passions along the way. We convince ourselves there’s no time or that they no longer matter. But your passions are part of your true self, and they deserve your attention. Start small by reigniting an old hobby, trying something new, or setting a goal that aligns with your desires. When you lean into these activities, you’ll feel more aligned with your true self and experience deeper fulfillment.

Take the Next Step

If finding your true self feels overwhelming, or you’re unsure where to start, know that you don’t have to go through this alone. If you’ve tried these steps but need more support, I’m here to help.

In my 6-month Unpause Your Dreams Coaching Accelerator, we’ll work together to peel back false identities and help you step fully into your authentic self. Because when you unpause your dreams, you unpause you.

Ready to take the next step? Book a consultation with me here, and let’s start your journey to finding your true self.

Fear of rejection is something we all deal with at one point or another. Whether it’s in relationships, business, or pursuing our dreams, this fear can creep in and stop us from going after what we truly want. But how do you know if the fear of rejection is holding you back, and what can you do to overcome it? Let’s dive in.

Overcoming fear of rejection

How to Know If You Struggle with Fear of Rejection

First, it’s important to recognize the signs. Fear of rejection doesn’t always show up as full-blown anxiety or panic. It can be subtle and sneaky, affecting your actions without you even realizing it. Here are some signs you might be dealing with it:

  • You avoid putting yourself out there: Whether it’s applying for a new job, starting a business, or asking someone on a date, you find reasons to delay or avoid it altogether.
  • You take criticism personally: Even constructive feedback feels like a personal attack, making you doubt yourself.
  • You seek approval from others: You constantly look for validation or permission to move forward with your decisions.
  • You downplay your goals: Instead of going after what you truly want, you settle for smaller, safer options.

If any of these resonate, it’s a sign that fear of rejection may be running the show in some areas of your life.

What Is Fear of Rejection, and Where Does It Come From?

Fear of rejection is the overwhelming worry that others will not accept or approve of us. At its core, it’s a fear of not being good enough or worthy enough. This fear often stems from past experiences—whether it’s a childhood memory of being left out, a failed relationship, or a business venture that didn’t work out. Over time, these experiences can build walls around our confidence, making us hesitant to try again.

But here’s the thing: rejection is a natural part of life. It’s not the rejection itself that defines us, but how we respond to it. When we let the fear of it control our actions, we end up playing small and holding back from what we’re truly capable of.

3 Action Steps to Overcome Fear of Rejection

Now that we’ve identified the problem, let’s get to the solution. Here are three action steps to help you in overcoming fear of rejection and start moving forward:

1. Shift Your Perspective on Rejection

Instead of viewing rejection as a personal failure, start seeing it as a learning opportunity. Every “no” is a chance to refine your approach and get closer to the right “yes.” The truth is, rejection doesn’t define your worth—it’s simply feedback. Try reframing it: “This didn’t work out this time, but what can I learn from this experience?”

2. Desensitize Yourself to Rejection

One way to weaken the power rejection holds over you is to face it head-on. Challenge yourself to step into situations where rejection is possible. Start small. Maybe that’s pitching an idea at work or asking someone for advice. The more you put yourself in these situations, the less intimidating they become. Remember, every rejection is building resilience.

3. Strengthen Your Self-Worth

Fear of rejection often stems from an underlying fear of not being enough. Focus on building a strong foundation of self-worth that isn’t dependent on external approval. Practice self-affirmations, surround yourself with supportive people, and invest in personal development. When you truly believe in your own value, rejection loses its sting because you’re no longer looking for others to validate your worth.

Take the Next Step

If fear of rejection is holding you back, and you’ve tried these action steps but need more support, I am here to help. In the 6-month 1:1 Unpause Your Dreams Coaching Accelerator, we’ll dive deep into breaking through the fear that’s keeping you stuck so you can start living life on your terms.

To book a consultation with me, click here.

Remember, rejection is just a redirection. It’s time to unpause your dreams and step boldly into the life you deserve.

Community Can Fuel Your Entrepreneurial Journey

Community Support for Entrepreneurs

Embarking on the journey of entrepreneurship can be both exciting and overwhelming. You might have a fantastic business idea, but without the right support and community, turning that idea into a successful venture can feel daunting. As women, we often face unique challenges in the business world, making a strong support network even more crucial. In this blog, we’ll explore the immense power of community and how surrounding yourself with the right people can fuel your entrepreneurial success.

The Role of a Supportive Community

In a recent conversation with a SCORE leader, I learned that out of the 250 applications for mentorship the Charlotte chapter gets a month, 65% are women business owners. Their greatest need that is unable to be met by the current SCORE offering, is the desire for entrepreneurial community. Based on my experience as a business coach & creative studio owner, this makes perfect sense. Supportive community provides more than just moral encouragement. It offers practical advice, resources, opportunities for collaboration and is vital to the success of new businesses. Here are a few ways a strong support network can make a significant difference in your entrepreneurial journey:

1. Encouragement and Motivation

  • Real-life stories: Learn from women entrepreneurs who overcame challenges with the help of their support networks.
  • Peer encouragement: Highlight the importance of having peers who understand your struggles and can offer motivation during tough times.

2. Knowledge and Skill Sharing

  • Workshops and Masterclasses: Discuss the benefits of attending workshops and classes with like-minded individuals.
  • Mentorship: Explain how finding mentors within your community can provide invaluable insights and guidance.
Community support for Women entrepreneurs

3. Networking Opportunities

  • Collaborations and Partnerships: Networking can lead to potential business collaborations and partnerships.
  • Expanding your reach: Being part of a community can help you reach a broader audience and attract new clients.

4. Accountability and Feedback

  • Accountability partners: You need accountability partners to help you stay on track with your goals.
  • Constructive feedback: Receive honest feedback to improve your business strategies.

5. Emotional Support

  • Empathy and understanding: Get emotional support from those who truly understand the highs and lows of entrepreneurship.
  • Mental health benefits: Access community support for entrepreneurs to eliminate feelings of isolation, contribute to better mental health and reduce stress.

How Unpause Your Dreams Creative Studio Can Help

At Unpause Your Dreams Creative Studio, we understand the vital role of community in achieving entrepreneurial success. Our studio is more than just a space for creating content; it’s a hub for women entrepreneurs to connect, collaborate, and support each other. Here’s how we foster strong community support for entrepreneurs:

  • Networking Events: Regular events where you can meet and connect with other women entrepreneurs.
  • Workshops and Masterclasses: Learning opportunities led by industry experts and successful entrepreneurs.
  • Collaborative Projects: Encouraging collaborations among our members to enhance creativity and business growth.
  • Support Groups: Dedicated groups where you can share your challenges and triumphs, and receive support from like-minded women.

Building a business is a journey that doesn’t have to be taken alone. With the right support and community, you can overcome obstacles, gain new perspectives, and achieve your entrepreneurial dreams. At Unpause Your Dreams Creative Studio, we’re here to provide the space, resources, and community you need to thrive. Join us and experience the power of a supportive network in transforming your business dreams into reality.

How to Start Your Business: 5 Steps to Find Direction

Start your business

Hey there, dreamers! Today, we’re diving into one of the most exciting—and sometimes challenging—parts of your entrepreneurial journey: finding your direction. Whether you’re just starting out or looking to pivot, discovering your entrepreneurial path is all about clarity, confidence, and deliberate action. Let’s break down how to start your business and find direction into five actionable steps:

1. Reflect on Your Passions and Strengths

Finding your direction begins with introspection. What lights you up? What are you naturally good at? Reflect on your passions—those things that make you lose track of time—and identify your strengths. Your entrepreneurial journey should align closely with what you love and where you excel.

2. Clarify Your Vision

Once you have a sense of what drives you, it’s time to clarify your vision. Where do you see yourself in the next year? Three years? Visualize your ideal future as an entrepreneur. What does success look like to you? This clarity will guide your decisions and actions moving forward.

3. Set HEART Goals

Now, let’s talk goals. In my coaching practice, I use HEART goals—goals that are Heartfelt, Engaging, Aligned, Responsive, and Transformative. These goals resonate deeply with your purpose and inspire you to take meaningful steps forward. Whether it’s launching a product, expanding your services, or reaching a specific revenue milestone, setting HEART goals ensures you’re moving in the right direction with passion and purpose.

4. Seek Mentorship and Support

No entrepreneur succeeds alone. Seek out mentors who have walked a similar path or are experts in your field. Their guidance can provide invaluable insights and shortcuts to success. Surround yourself with a supportive community—whether online or offline—of fellow entrepreneurs who understand the challenges and joys of building something from the ground up.

5. Take Action Consistently

Finally, take deliberate action every day towards your goals. Break down your vision into actionable steps and commit to consistent progress. Entrepreneurship is a journey of continuous learning and adaptation. Embrace the process, celebrate your wins, and learn from setbacks. Stay focused on your long-term vision while remaining flexible to adjust your course as needed.

Ready to Unpause Your Dreams?

Finding your entrepreneurial direction is a journey of self-discovery and intentional growth. By reflecting on your passions, clarifying your vision, setting HEART goals, seeking mentorship, and taking consistent action, you’re laying a strong foundation for success. Embrace the adventure ahead, and remember, all journeys begin with a single step.

Are you ready to unpause your dreams? Let’s make it happen together. Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below—I’d love to hear about your entrepreneurial journey and how you’re finding your direction. Here’s to achieving dreams and building a life you love!

Until next time,

Charlene

50 Low-Cost Business Ideas You Can Start While Working Full-Time

As a coach, I act as a guide to help 9 to 5ers start their own business and make their first sale within 90 days. With guidance, you will realize you are the hero of your own story and that launching your side hustle defeats all of your enemies–the unfulfilling job, the economy, and the fear of never being free to have the life you really want. It’s as easy as 1,2,3,4. Let me show you.

Step 1. Assess your current skillset, passions and interests. Step 2. Explore business ideas that align with your findings. Step 3. Pick one offer/product to start. Step 4. Set aside 5 hours a week and get to work.

Here are 50 low cost business ideas that require less than $5,000 in startup costs, no new skills, and that you can make your first sale this month—all while keeping your full-time job.

Creative Services

  1. Freelance Graphic Design: Use your existing design skills to create logos, advertisements, and more.
  2. Photography: Start by offering headshot sessions or product photography.
  3. Writing Services: Provide copywriting, blogging, or ghostwriting services.
  4. Handmade Crafts: Sell your crafts on platforms like Etsy.
  5. Jewelry Making: Design and sell custom jewelry.
  6. Affirmation Card Business: Create and sell unique affirmation or inspiration cards.
  7. Resume Writing: Help job seekers improve their resumes.
  8. Event Planning: Coordinate small events or parties.
  9. Interior Decorating/Staging: Offer your flair for home aesthetics.
  10. Cake Decorating: Create and sell custom cakes for events.

Tech Services

  1. Web Design: Build websites for small businesses.
  2. App Development: Develop simple apps for local businesses.
  3. Tech Support: Offer remote tech support.
  4. SEO Consulting: Help businesses improve their online visibility.
  5. Social Media Management: Manage social media accounts for brands.
  6. Video Editing: Provide video editing services for content creators.
  7. Podcast Editing: Edit audio and/or video for podcasters.
  8. Online Tutoring: Teach subjects you are knowledgeable about.
  9. Language Translation: Offer translation services for documents or websites.
  10. E-commerce Consultant: Help businesses set up online stores.

Personal Services

  1. Personal Shopping: Assist others in shopping for fashion or groceries.
  2. Fitness Coaching: Offer fitness classes or personal training online.
  3. Nutrition Planning: Provide meal plans and nutrition advice.
  4. Life Coaching: Help clients achieve personal goals.
  5. Beauty Consulting: Give beauty and makeup advice.
  6. Pet Sitting: Look after pets in your spare time.
  7. Babysitting: Offer flexible babysitting services during off-hours.
  8. Elder Care: Assist with non-medical care for the elderly.
  9. House Cleaning: Provide cleaning services.
  10. Lawn Care: Offer landscaping and lawn maintenance.

Retail and E-Commerce

  1. Dropshipping: Sell products online without holding inventory.
  2. Online Boutique: Curate a selection of products to sell online.
  3. Art Dealer: Sell artwork online or at local fairs.
  4. Vintage Goods Seller: Curate and sell vintage items.
  5. Specialty Food Store: Sell homemade or specialty foods.
  6. Print-on-Demand: Sell custom-designed t-shirts, mugs, and more.
  7. Subscription Boxes: Create and sell subscription boxes in a niche market.
  8. Furniture Upcycling: Refurbish and sell old furniture.
  9. Book Reseller: Buy and sell books online.
  10. Beauty Products Seller: Create and sell your own line of beauty products.

Consulting and Professional Services

  1. Project Management Consulting: Assist businesses with project planning and management.
  2. Financial Advising: Help clients manage their finances.
  3. Legal Consulting: Offer consulting in your area of legal expertise.
  4. Market Research: Conduct and sell market research reports.
  5. Public Speaking Coach: Help others improve their speaking skills.
  6. Career Coaching: Assist people with career planning and transitions.
  7. Corporate Training: Offer training sessions for businesses.
  8. HR Consulting: Provide HR and recruitment advice.
  9. Business Coaching: Use your expertise to help others grow their businesses.
  10. Real Estate Consulting: Assist clients with buying, selling, or renting property.

This list is just the beginning. Each idea can be tailored to your unique skills and life circumstances.

Schedule a consultation for more information about 1:1 coaching to help you turn your entrepreneurial dreams into reality!

3 Steps to Become a Professional Speaker

Launch Your Speaking Career with Unpause Your Dreams Creative Studio

As a speaker and coach, I often get asked, “How do I start getting paid to speak?” The simplest answer is to get started and get yourself on more and more stages. While this might sound straightforward, securing that first speaking gig is more challenging than it appears. Many aspiring speakers find this daunting and feel tempted to give up. Don’t let this be you. Instead, embrace creative strategies to chase your dream of speaking onstage. This guide outlines an actionable plan to kickstart your speaking career today.

1. Rent the Space

Your first step is finding a venue for your initial talk. If you’re an aspiring speaker in the Charlotte, NC area, Unpause Your Dreams Creative Studio is crafted just for you. Designed to help you stand in front of an audience and speak confidently, our studio accommodates up to 50 people—perfect for a substantial yet intimate gathering. If you’re not in Charlotte, look for a similar venue that can cater to a small, engaged audience.

2. Get an Audience

Attracting an audience is your next move. You can either sell tickets to cover expenses and earn a profit, or invite family and friends for free. This crucial step fills the room and enhances the quality of your event’s video content. If undecided, starting with familiar faces is an excellent way to dip your toes into public speaking. Their support will not only boost your confidence but also help you appear more natural and engaging on video.

3. Hire a Videographer

Content creation is essential—it’s your social proof! To leverage your speaking event fully, hire a professional videographer to capture high-quality footage. This material serves several purposes: a speaker reel to help you land future gigs, a long-form video of your talk for YouTube to boost your visibility and establish expertise, and short clips for dynamic content like Instagram and Facebook Reels, blog posts, and YouTube Shorts.

Pro Tip: Maximize Your Content

To further capitalize on your event, bring several outfits and plan multiple talks. At Unpause Your Dreams Creative Studio, use our dressing room to change looks and tackle different topics. This approach not only enriches your content but also showcases your versatility, enhancing your online presence and positioning you as an expert.

This plan simplifies the process of starting your speaking career into three manageable steps: rent the space, gather your audience, and record your event. Follow these steps, and you’ll not only have successfully hosted your first talk but also created valuable content to propel your future speaking endeavors. So, stop overthinking—rent the space, assemble your audience, and hire the videographer. Your speaking career is waiting!

About Charlene Ridley

I’m Charlene Ridley, a seasoned speaker, coach, serial entrepreneur, and the founder of Unpause Your Dreams Creative Studio. If you’re a woman in Charlotte, NC, aspiring to launch your speaking career, it’s time to act. Book your slot at Unpause Your Dreams Creative Studio and transform your speaking aspirations into reality.

Mastering Content Creation:

Strategies for Engaging and Impactful Media

In the digital age, content is the currency of engagement. Whether you’re a marketer, entrepreneur, blogger, or creative, the ability to craft compelling content is crucial for standing out in a crowded marketplace. This blog post explores effective strategies for creating content that not only engages but also converts.

1. Understand Your Audience

Before you start creating content, it’s essential to know who you are creating it for. Use analytics tools to gather data on your audience’s demographics, interests, and behavior. Tailoring your content to meet the specific needs and preferences of your target audience will increase its relevance and impact.

2. Set Clear Objectives

What do you want to achieve with your content? Are you looking to increase brand awareness, drive traffic, generate leads, or educate your audience? Setting clear objectives will help guide your content strategy and measure its success.

3. Choose the Right Format

Different formats resonate with different audiences. Whether it’s blogs, videos, podcasts, infographics, or social media posts, choosing the right format is key. Consider what formats are most likely to appeal to your audience and what will best convey your message.

4. Create Valuable and Relevant Content

The content you produce should provide value to your audience. This could be through solving a problem, providing new information, or offering entertainment. Ensure that your content is not only interesting but also relevant to your audience’s needs and desires.

5. Optimize for Search Engines

SEO is crucial for ensuring your content reaches its target audience. Use relevant keywords, meta descriptions, alt text for images, and structured content to improve your SEO rankings. This will help your content get discovered through search engines.

6. Engage with Visuals

Visuals can dramatically increase engagement. Incorporate relevant images, videos, and other multimedia elements to break up text, illustrate points, and keep your audience engaged. Tools like Canva or Adobe Spark make it easy to create professional-looking graphics.

7. Promote Your Content

Creating great content is just the first step. You also need to promote it to ensure it reaches a wide audience. Use social media, email newsletters, and your personal network to share your content. Consider using paid advertising for wider reach.

8. Analyze and Adapt

Finally, use analytics to track the performance of your content. Look at metrics like views, engagement rates, and conversions. This data will provide insights into what’s working and what’s not, allowing you to refine your strategy and improve future content.

Content creation is both an art and a science. By understanding your audience, setting clear objectives, and using the right formats and promotional strategies, you can create content that not only engages but also achieves your business goals. Keep refining your approach based on analytics and feedback, and over time, your content will become more effective and impactful.

Whether you are a hobbyist looking to share your passion or a business aiming to expand your reach, mastering the art of content creation is key to engaging your audience and achieving success.


By Charlene Ridley, Coach, Serial Entrepreneur and Founder of the Unpause Your Dreams Creative Studio. If you are an aspiring or experienced woman entrepreneur in Charlotte, NC and need to make time to create content batches Book time at the Unpause Your Dreams Creative Studio.